


Perfect

by hyucksake



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Angst, Drabbles, Fluff, Gen, Implied/Referenced Drug Use, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Non-Linear Narrative, implied/referenced eating disorder
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-26
Updated: 2019-01-30
Packaged: 2019-10-13 02:57:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 990
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17479913
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hyucksake/pseuds/hyucksake
Summary: perfectadjective/ˈpəːfɪkt/1.having all the required or desirable elements, qualities, or characteristics; as good as it is possible to be.where each member has their own idea of perfection.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> this is my first au so please bear with my atrocious writing, perhaps this is just me self-projecting but let's just ignore that and read the fic (or don't, it's up to you really).

Perfection. Such a fickle and confusing word. The definition of what perfection is differs depending on the person, as every human has a different view on life. This is what makes perfection impossible to achieve in the eyes of others, but that never stops people from trying.

“Seungmin!” The shout sounded distant in the boy’s ears, not registering in his mind until it was repeated once more, a more aggressive ring to the word this time. Saving the document to his computer he stood up from his desk and moved into the kitchen, somewhat warily, as his mother wasn’t in a good mood that day.

“Yes?” He threw the question out there, curious and somewhat scared for the response he would get. And he didn’t get one for what felt for eternity as the woman stared him down before sighing in, _oh no_ , disappointment.

“What's this?" His mother's tone was stern and almost icy, and Seungmin saw what she held in her right hand, his report card.

_Shit_. "I-I can explain-" The boy started, fear making his voice shake.

"B minus in Maths," Her voice was soft, yet laced with poison, and Seungmin braced for the worst. "I thought I'd raised you better than this, Seungmin."

"Please Ma, I-I'm trying, I really am-" He pleaded to the woman who's face remained closed off and cold.

"You're not trying hard enough," She said, voice low. "Now get out of my sight." And the boy hurried away, tears blurring his line of vision, he would have to go without dinner today. A disappointment like himself doesn't deserve to eat anyway, that was what his mother had taught him from a young age.

_"Why can't you be more like Woojin."_ His mother had drilled this phrase into his head from when he started high school, his brother Woojin had graduated last year and was now working on getting his degree as a doctor. Woojin had a more happy disposition compared to Seungmin, something that made people love him more. Why would anyone pay attention to the boy's sad shadow of a younger brother?

He didn't mean to compare himself to his brother, it was just a force of habit at this point.

Perhaps if he was more like Woojin, people would like him more, his mother might pay attention to him in a positive manner.

Now that, _Seungmin thought_ , would be perfect.


	2. Improve

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hyunjin just wants to improve so he can become perfect in his own eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i don't know if anyone will actually read this but if so, i hope you enjoy it.

Perhaps some people didn’t struggle with trying to achieve perfection within the eyes of others, but rather they sought perfection in the eyes of themselves, a task that for some, was impossible.

And it was for that reason that Hwang Hyunjin found himself in the dance practice room at three am on a school night, trying to perfect a dance move. But no matter how hard he tried, no matter how many times he redid the move, he just didn’t think it was good enough.

“Fuck!” He cursed and slid down the mirror, eyes half lidded with exhaustion, his shirt drenched in sweat.

Lee Felix had gotten the move correct almost immediately, Hyunjin thought to himself, the Australian never seemed to struggle with his dancing, always wearing his stupidly bright smile like it was an accessory.

And it was at three am on a school night that Hyunjin sobbed, as he felt so far from perfection. And he felt possibly one of the ugliest emotions as he cursed the Australian boy who never struggled, jealousy.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is very short, but i hope it wasn't that bad.


	3. insecure

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> lee minho just wants to look nicer.

Lee Minho was insecure, though it didn’t seem like it, he was. Though he made jokes about his appearance being out of this world he felt freakish, he felt that he was too loud and annoying and felt that his friends would be better off without him. 

"You gonna eat that?" His best friend Chan spoke, interrupting his internal monologue. Minho smiled at the older boy who sat, eyeing off the slice of pizza left unattended to on his plate.

"You can have it."  _ Wasn't planning on eating anyway. _

"Thanks man." And the smile Chan gave the boy fucking shattered him inside,  _ way to make me feel guilty Chan _ . He didn't understand  _ why  _ he felt guilty, it wasn't his duty to tell Chan everything and he wasn't doing anything wrong. He just wanted to lose a bit of weight, that's all.

Yet as he stared at the number the scales showed him later that day, he felt anything but perfect.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> again, very short but i hope you enjoyed!


	4. jisung

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> jisung isn't good enough for his boyfriend

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i genuinely wasn't expecting anyone to read this omg, thank you.

Deep breath in. And exhale. Jisung repeated those actions, watching the smoke fly from his lips in delicate looking tendrils. It was peaceful, the action of smoking weed being kind of like his form of meditation. He took another hit from the joint, cursing as his phone began to vibrate in the pocket of his jeans. The caller id “Baby” lit up his screen, and, sighing in slight annoyance, the boy answered.

“Jisung?” Minho’s voice blared through the phone’s speaker.

“Yeah? What’s up?” Jisung asked lazily, watching the smoke blow away in the wind.

“Are you free currently?” Minho asked him. Jisung cursed under his breath, Minho hates it when he gets high.

“Uh-define ‘free’.” He spoke distractedly, staring at the joint held lazily between two fingers.

“Can I come over?” 

“I don’t know, can you?”

“Jisung I swear to God.”

“What God? Is there a God?” Jisung was spurting nonsense at this point, giggling slightly at the frustrated sigh his boyfriend gave him in return.

“Jisung,” The older boy’s tone of voice turned serious. “Are you high?”

Shit. “Perhaps.” The boy giggled airily. There was silence on Minho’s end of the call.

“I thought you said you’d stop.” The older boy’s tone of voice was soft and somewhat disappointed.

“No, you said I’d stop.” Jisung corrected the elder.

“Whatever, call me when you’re not high.” Minho spat, and before Jisung could say anything, the boy had hung up.

“‘M sorry I can’t be perfect for you.” He mumbled stomping the leftover joint into the soil.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> not my best, and probably not a completely accurate depiction of how someone acts when they're high, but oh well. dialogue is not my forte i'm sorry lol.
> 
>  
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> if you want you can follow me on twitter @hyucksake uwu

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading! feel free to leave feedback in the comments, i take constructive criticism as it helps me see where i need to improve lol.


End file.
